In 2012 my personal life unraveled. My beloved mother passed away from Leukemia at 12:13am on July 31, 2012. My world ended. My heart shattered into millions of pieces. That broke me. I was broken. Shortly thereafter, my maternal grandmother, who was my heart, passed away and I was diagnosed with breast cancer, all in three and a half months. I was numb. Not because I was diagnosed with cancer, I was numb because I was still sad, I was still broken. But, I had to make a choice and resurrect that woman who went through life at 120 miles per hour in the snow — that woman who was not going to let this break her.
Now please do not get me wrong, I had every right to be broken after my dear mommy answered God’s whisper on July 31, 2012. But for this fight, I needed all the rocket fuel I used to have in my spirit, every ounce of perseverance and, joy. I needed the unyielding faith that I saw in my mommy every single day even through the toughest days of her Leukemia journey. I needed her examples of love, inspiration and penchant for thriving in the midst of life’s storm. Every since I was 5 years old, I wanted to be like her and this time was no different.
Optimism is More Than a Sunny Outlook
Being optimistic doesn’t simply meaning looking at the world through rose-colored glasses. If anything, being diagnosed with cancer reminds us that life is not always a bowl of good homemade ice cream or your favorite dessert.
And there’s no need to walk around spewing empty platitudes, especially if you don’t mean or believe them. No, optimism encompasses much more than this. Chiefly, optimism is about mastering a mindset that acknowledges that adversity is nearly always just a temporary setback. Let me repeat that: a temporary setback. Too often in life, and especially after we hear the words, “You have cancer,” it’s easy to dwell on adversity. But that’s exactly what we need to avoid doing and know there is power in our survival, and I knew I was going to survive this.
The Cancer Train Left The Station At Full Speed
On October 28, 2012, after my yearly mammogram, I was diagnosed with Stage II breast cancer and the cancer train left the station at full speed. The first doctor I saw was my incredible breast surgeon, Dahlia M. Sataloff, MD, FACS who spoke to me with care and urgency. Dr. Sataloff recommended other incredible doctors to be a part of my care team including, my Oncologist, David M. Mintzer, MD, Radiation Oncologist, James D. Kolker, MD and, because I was 40 with a desire to have a child, an oncology fertility specialist, Clarisa R. Gracia, MD, MSCE.
I started the new year with my first chemo session, things were going well and in February, Dr. Mintzer ordered a PET Scan to see how things were progressing. The results of the PET Scan revealed my breast cancer metastasized to my liver and changed the staging to IV. Dr. Mintzer, sent me to GI Surgeon, Dr. Matt L. Kirkland, MD, FACS and I asked him the same question I asked Dr. Sataloff and Dr. Mintzer, “Can you fix this?” — he said, “We are going to try our best.”
Dr. Kirkland explained to me that my surgery would be in April, and I would be in intensive care for one night then spend three to four days in the hospital. My surgery went better than expected and I did not need to spend the night in intensive care. I went home in three days and walked Lincoln Drive in Philadelphia later that week.
Maintaining an Optimistic Attitude Through Diagnosis, Treatment and Beyond
The most successful optimists never forget what they have to be thankful for. It’s important to feel grateful for what we have in the present and for me it was my incredible and knowledgeable doctors, my extremely supportive and loving family and friends, and most importantly, an optimistic attitude.
To maintain my optimistic attitude I, personally, I keep a gratitude notebook where I record at least 3 to 5 things that I’m grateful for at the very start of my day. It helps me approach each morning with a positive frame of mind and gives me comfort knowing that I have a fantastic foundation to build upon every day — no matter what may happen. I still have my “Pink Book/Journal” that I used during my cancer journey. When adversity is your teacher, there are unique superpowers you have from your experiences.
After completing my remaining chemo sessions, lumpectomy and radiation, on January 28, 2013, I was inducted into the Flourishing Hall of Fame, I was cancer free! That was the day I became unbreakable. If it were not for my mother’s examples of how to power through, my family and friends, and my own optimism, I would not be here today. The power of your rearview also shows you and me the power of our survival.
How To Survive and Thrive During Cancer Treatment
I know this can be very hard to do, but these tips can help you survive and thrive.
Do not think of your diagnosis as a negative season in your life to endure
Change the way you tell your story. Winning begins when you change the way you tell your story. Consider this perspective — I am stronger than I think. I may not feel well today, but tomorrow is a new day. I am going to survive this!
Practice gratitude
Gratitude is the rocket fuel to our resilience. Consider all the people and things in your life that you’re grateful for, let gratitude shine a light in your soul. If you are reading this, be grateful for your survival. We do not become the best version of ourselves by living untested. Gratitude is a game-changer and alters the trajectory of your life.
We will survive this because of our courage to win and our persistence to be “Cancer Free!”
Live life without your brakes on, your future survivorship deserves it!
Kimberly S. Reed is an award-winning international speaker, author, corporate trainer and diversity, equality and inclusion executive. She is a nationally recognized thought leader, expert, strategist and advisor to some of the world’s most influential organizations in global professional services, health care, financial services, consumer products and pharmaceutical industries. A seasoned leader in transforming organizations into high-performing enterprises and challenging leaders to live without limits, Kimberly has more than 25 years of HR, talent acquisition and diversity and inclusion experience. She has successfully turned around troubled diversity practices by designing, building, leading and shaping high-performing cultures at global organizations with robust strategies, global employee development programs and enterprise-wide initiatives that have increased revenue growth and organizational brand eminence.
Kimberly has developed a distinguished reputation as having one of the most distinct and powerful voices on the lecture circuit transforming the thinking of thousands. Kimberly’s infectious energy, lioness tone and inspiring sincerity engages audiences on topics ranging from the innovation and evolution of diversity, equality, inclusion and belonging, personal, professional and leadership development, entrepreneurship to teaching us Optimists Always Win!
Kimberly’s book “Optimists Always Win! Moving From Defeat to Life’s C-Suite” is available on Amazon with the forward written by Dahlia M. Sataloff, MD, FACS.